The Time Has Come

Oh boy, it's decision time. The clock has started and I need to make a decision. Do I buy the cafe and open the cupcake/sandwich shop or do I go back to modeling? ugh. Even though the modeling is great pay, travel, hob-nob with the rich and famous...blah, blah, blah...I am just tired of trying to keep my figure at a size 4. It is almost impossible. Oh wait, wait a second....size 4? I must have been regressing to second grade. Okay, big deal, so I am not a model...so what? I bake better than any model. I can cook up a mess of grade A cookies faster than a super model can barf up her lunch! So there! Take that you skinny, bleached blonde schmuck! So here are my two choices, work for some stupid office doing work I hate 40 hours a week or bake my socks off for 80 hours a week and don't know if I would hate it or not. I love to bake but if I HAVE TO bake will it become a "job"? They both will pay the same....nothing again, as usual. At the accounting position I will have some benefits that I really don't need (after all, who needs a 401K?) and at the bakery job I will have only one benefit and that is a private, all mine bathroom. Who will cover for me if I am sick? Who will cover me if I want to fly to Hawaii for lunch? Who will cover for me if I wanna run away? What if all my employees quit and I have to work 1228 billion hours every year?? It's funny, I wanted to work about three days a week from here on out and now I am signing up for six days a week. What am I thinking? Of course, James says I have to work 5 days for someone else or 6 for myself. What is that about? See why I was looking for a rich, single plastic surgeon? James and I went through all the numbers today and I am estimating that I will gross about 32 cents the first year of business. Maybe68 cents if I put out one of those "take a penny" saucers out and steal from it every night. What if nobody ever eats there, ever? What am I going to do with 42 pounds of party ham and 14 pounds of Velveeta...oh sure, Christmas gifts but Kris hates cheese so what do I give her? Oh hey Kris, Merry Christmas, here I got you 576 straws and a half a box of coffee stirrers. David, I know how much you like plastic cutlery, and Janice, you are my favorite so here, here is your brand new, used hot dog roller and steamer. Yep everyone...Merry Christmas!!! Okay so my fears are, no one will eat there, I won't be able to make payroll even if they do show up, I will fall and knock my hip out of socket, roaches and mice will overtake my space, I will run out of Diet Coke in the machine from my constant craving of carbonation, my ice machine will break down right as I open for the first day, and a brand new "cupcakes r us" will open across the street the day after I sign the lease. Wow. Anybody know of an accounting office that needs help? WAAAAAAAAAH. I am optimistic though. I hope my mom would at least come over the first day and buy a coke. Of course, I would feel obligated to give it to her for free so that really doesn't help things. Can I right that off as a business expense I wonder? She would probably not come back.....she hates places that have bad service. I have decided on my colors for the cafe and the name so maybe it's time to take the chance and dive right in. In my earlier years, I had no fear. No fear of anything. I would fly, no problem, I would get into strangers cars while cruising the boulevard, no problem, I would drive in snow, ice, no problem. Now, I won't hardly go to the bathroom without a phone, you never know when your big toe might get stuck in the drain and you would have to call 911. I am horrified by the thought of flying, after all, what if some maintenance guy forgets to put one of the lug nuts that holds some really important wingy part of the plane back on? What if, just on the off chance that BOTH of the pilots have heart attacks, what if that giant monkey from that Twilight Zone episode comes back and it's flying on the wing? HUH?? Then what would you do? Oh sure, laugh if you want but don't be calling me on the $42 in flight phone call to tell me that monkey is back! I don't drive if it even looks like it is going to sprinkle, little alone on ice. I won't get into a strangers car anymore unless it has Arizona license tags and of course there is that bathroom phone emergency stuff. So, in my short life, I have gone from fearless to scaredy cat. If I was 23, I would think the bakery was an adventure and so what if it doesn't work out? I can always find some high paying job at the mall, folding 479,222 outifts that all the 14 year olds dumped on the floor of the dressing room! And when I got sick of that job there are still 13 places in Topeka that I haven't worked so big buzz! Oh no....who will watch the bakery when I am in Cancun every May. Uh....I don't miss Cancun for anything! Uh hello........I have to fly to get there...that is traumatic in itself! If I am willing to risk life and limb for sunny beaches well then.....

I think the previous paragraph was a little bit, well let's say it was grammatically incorrect. Is that even right? Grammatically incorrect? Boy, good thing I am not trying out for English 101 teacher of the year!

Okay, my decision is to go for it! Yep. Well until tomorrow when I change my mind and then again tomorrow afternoon and then again tomorrow night..........etc.

Ugh...why is this so hard. If this was a gift shop I would be all over it. I know how to do that. Food service? hmmmm.....I have no idea what I am even doing. I guess it is time to call the health department to get some regulation books or whatever you call them. If I am going to do this, I am going to do it right. Anyone out there know anything about running a restaurant? lol....I guess I am about to find out!